A fire fighter is working on the engine outside the
station when he notices a little girl next door in a
little red wagon with little ladders hung off the
sides and a garden hose tightly coiled in the middle.
The girl is wearing a fire fighter's helmet. The wagon
is being pulled by her dog and her cat.
The fire fighter walked over to take a closer look.
"That sure is a nice fire truck," the fire fighter
says with admiration.
"Thanks" the girl, says.
The firefighter looks a little closer and notices the
girl has tied the wagon to her dog's collar and to the cat's testicles.
"Little Partner", the fire fighter says, "I don't want
to tell you how to run your rig, but if you were to
tie that rope around the cat's collar too, I think you
could go faster."
The little girl replies thoughtfully, "You're probably
right, but then I wouldn't have a siren."
Didn't your parents teach you NOT to park in front of fire hydrants???
[Fire Related(??)] Be sure to read it with a Southern Accent! Redneck Nativity Scene In a small Southern town there was a "Nativity Scene" that showed great skill and talent had gone into creating it. One small feature bothered me. The three wise men were wearing firemen's helmets. Totally unable to come up with a reason or explanation, I left. At a "Quick Stop" on the edge of town, I asked the lady behind the counter about the helmets. She exploded into a rage, yelling at me, "You darn Yankees never do read the Bible!" I assured her that I did, but simply couldn't recall anything about firemen in the Bible. She jerked her Bible from behind the counter and ruffled thru some pages and finally jabbed her finger at a passage. Sticking it in my face she said "See, it says right here, 'The three wise man came from afar!"
*FIRE DEPARTMENT* One dark night outside of Westlake, a small town in Louisiana, a fire started inside the local chemical plant and in a blink of an eye it exploded into massive flames. The alarm went out to all the fire departments for miles around. When the volunteer fire fighters appeared on the scene, the chemical company president rushed to the fire chief and said, "All our secret formulas are in the vault in the center of the plant. They must be saved. I will give $50,000 to the fire department that brings them out intact." But the roaring flames held the firefighters off. Soon more fire departments had to be called in as the situation became desperate. As the firemen arrived, the president shouted out that the offer was now $100,000 to the fire department who could bring out the company's secret files. From a distance, a lone siren was heard as another fire truck came into sight. It was the nearby Cajun Hackberry Rural Township Volunteer Fire Company, composed mainly of Cajuns over the age of 65. To everyone's amazement, that little run-down fire engine roared right past all the newer sleek engines that were parked outside the plant. Without even slowing down, it drove straight into the middle of the inferno. Outside, the other firemen watched as the Hackberry old timers jumped off right in the middle of the fire and fought it back on all sides. It was a performance and effort never seen before. Within a short time, the Cajun old timers had extinguished the fire and had saved the secret formulas. The grateful chemical company president announced that for such a superhuman feat he was upping the reward to $200,000, and walked over to personally thank each of the brave fire fighters. The local KPLC TV news reporter rushed in to capture the event on film, asking the chief, "What are you going to do with all that money?" "Whall," said Boudreaux, the 70-year-old fire chief, "Da first ting we gonna do is fix dem brakes on dat damn truck!"